The Parrot and the Igloo Notes

Glengarry Glen Monckton

354   the science is not settled: Wesley J. Smith, “Global Warming Hysteria: Lord Monckton Parachutes into Durban,” National Review, December 7, 2011.

If the dive is something you’d like to watch:

“CFACT Parachutes Into Durban Climate Conference,” December 6, 2011.

Accessed 7-14-22.


354   “My lovely wife”: Lord Christopher Monckton, “The Climate Camel—Going Nowhere, Uncomfortably: From Monckton of Arabia Somewhere in the Desert, Qatar,” December 5, 2012,

Plus a photo of Monckton in what Monckton-type people generally like to call “mufti.”

Accessed 7-15-22.


354   banned for life: Fiona Harvey, “Ukip’s Lord Monckton Thrown Out of Doha Climate Talks,” The Guardian, December 7, 2012.

Philip Bump, “Famed Idiot Lord Monckton Banned for Life From U.N. Climate Talks,” December 7, 2012, Grist. With a great photo of Monckton in non-mufti—just looking like Monckton day-to-day, which is still funny.

Accessed 7-15-22.

YouTube: “Lord Monckton at Doha Climate Talks Pretending to Be Myanmar,” December 7, 2012.

Accessed 7-15-22.


354   “the high priest of”: BBC, Our World, “The Rise of the Sceptics,” February 27, 2010.

And this, too, is on YouTube.

“Climate Change—Rise of the Sceptics 1 of 2—BBC Our World Documentary,” February 4, 2011.

Accessed 7-15-22.

“Climate Change—Rise of the Sceptics 2 of 2—BBC Our World Documentary,” February 4, 2011.

Accessed 7-15-22.

355   the Republicans have imported: U.S. House of Representatives, “Hearing Before the Select Committee on Energy Independence and Global Warming, House of Representatives, One Hundred Eleventh Congress, Second Session,” May 6, 2010. U.S. Government Printing Office, 2010.


355   “without the right to sit or vote”: Leo Hickman, “Lord Monckton Throws His Safari Helmet In The Ring As Ukip Candidate,” The Guardian, Environment Blog, April 20, 2010. I’d take the link just for the photo. Which will stick in your head.

Accessed 7-16-22.


If you’d like to hear the viscount make the House of Lords claim live, there’s this interview on Australian radio.

Adam Spencer, “Controversial Climate Sceptic Lord Christopher Monckton Is Currently in Australia on a Lecture Tour. He Spoke Not Once, But Twice to Adam Spencer This Morning,” Australian Broadcasting Corporation, July 7, 2011.

Accessed 7-16-22.


356   “I must therefore ask”: Leo Hickman, “Climate Sceptic Lord Monckton Told He’s Not Member of House of Lords,” The Guardian, Environment Blog, July 18, 2011.

Accessed 7-16-22.


The House of Lords has taken the unprecedented step of publishing a “cease and desist” letter on its website demanding that Lord Christopher Monckton, a prominent climate sceptic and the UK Independence party’s head of research, should stop claiming to be a member of the upper house.


If you’d like to read the document on the Parliament site:

Accessed 7-16-22.


356   “chemical nonsense”: The report is forty-eight pages. But four are Monckton’s.

“Climate Scientists Respond: Response to the Written Testimony of Christopher Monckton in Connection with the May 6, 2010 Hearing Before the Select Committee on Energy Independence and Global Warming,” September 2010.

You can find a copy here:

Accessed 7-16-22.


Leo Hickman, “‘Chemical Nonsense’: Leading Scientists Refute Lord Monckton’s Attack On Climate Science; Nine ‘Profoundly Wrong’ Claims Made by Ukip Deputy Leader Refuted by Climate Experts in a Document Filed with US Congress,” The Guardian, September 21, 2010.


356   from the well-drilled state of: Texas, not Oklahoma as in text. This reader was apparently so exasperated by Senator James Mountain Inhofe that even neighboring legislative formations were tugged into his state's direction. In early 2019, Joe Barton retired from Congress, following revelations of disrobed self-portraiture and threats to the electronic recipient of same.

Mike DeBonis, Elise Viebeck, "Congressman on Tape Tells Woman He Would Report Her to Capitol Police Because She Could Expose His Secret Sex Life," Washington Post, November 22, 2017. Dallas Morning News, “After Cringe-worthy Photo, Let voters Decide on Rep. Joe Barton's Future,” November 27, 2017. ("Like everyone," noted the DMN editorial board, "we were nonplussed by the photo circulating around the internet last week of Rep. Joe Barton, naked with his privates (thankfully) obscured by a squiggly blue marker.") Katie Leslie, "Rep. Joe Barton: I will not seek re-election," Dallas Morning News, November 30, 2017. So, smokey in more than one way.


356   “He is generally acknowledged”: U.S. Federal News Service, “Mankind Always Adapts To Climate, Rep. Barton Says,” March 28, 2009.


And here is video of the Rep. extending the welcome. Joe Barton, so reliably pro-fuel his House nickname was "Smokey" Joe.

Satyam Khanna, “Rep. Barton: Climate Change Is ‘Natural,’ Humans Should Just ‘Get Shade,’” Think Progress, March 26, 2009.

Accessed 7-16-22.


356   “a leading climate skeptic”: Elisabeth Rosenthal, “Skeptics Find Fault With U.N. Climate Panel,” The New York Times, February 8, 2010.


356   the three skeptic leaders globally: Nicholas St. Fleur, “Where In the World Is Climate Change Denial Most Prevalent?”, The New York Times, December 11, 2015.


356   “Al Gore’s chief critic”: CNN, Lou Dobbs Tonight, April 24, 2009.


356   “The most effective climate skeptic”: Miranda Devine, “Climategate Gives Lord of The Sceptics Plenty of Ammunition,” The Sydney Morning Herald, January 28, 2010.

The Independent just has him as “one of the world’s most prominent climate-change sceptics.”

Tim Hume, “This Woman Earns £1M an Hour,” The Independent, June 16, 2012.


356   in a castle with sheeted-over furniture: Levy G. Hardy, “Diana’s Search For Faith,” The Herald Sun, June 19, 1993.

John Reith, “John Reith’s Diary: An Eyewitness Account of the King’s Abdication,” BBC Archive Document, December 1936.

A really interesting document; Reith was six-foot-six, extremely English (grievously wounded in World War One, he reputedly said, “I’m very angry and I’ve spoilt a new tunic”), knighted young, and Director-General of the BBC. So read the document and you’re hearing the preferred voice of the era.

Accessed 7-15-22.


Royalty Monthly, “Royal Feud,” April 2017.

Christopher Monckton, Walter Monckton by H. Montgomery Hyde (Book Review), The Spectator, June 1, 1996.


356   “All cats to be muzzled outside”: Lucy Ward, “Muzzle Cats and Embrace IT Say Peers Pitching for Power,” The Guardian, October 15, 1999.

I believe this is also the plot of the Jonathan Franzen novel Freedom.


357   “One must hope”: The New Statesman, “Poor Marx,” November 19, 1982.


357   “science policy advisor”: For example, Tim Adams, “Monckton Saves the Day!” The Guardian, May 6, 2007.

One of those little truth warnings accidentally served up by your loved ones. Last line of the piece, Monckton’s wife, Juliet: “Christopher’s terrifically clever, but he can’t stop talking.”


357   “a figure of fun”: Andrew Grimson, “The Guardians of Thatcherism,” The Spectator, June 8, 1985.


357   the U.K. power hat: “Terribly Decent Chaps,” The Economist, September 8, 1984.

A great detail that couldn’t easily be fitted into the above graf; how the young Monckton saw his job. (The “Beefsteak” mentioned here is a London club.)


The Young Fogey—it goes without saying—is a Rhinoceros-skinned creature. Step forward the Hon. Christopher Monckton, one of the Friedmannite miniature gnomes at Number 10 advising Mrs. Finchley on Home Affairs. Dining at the Beefsteak the other day, Harrow-educated Monckton, 32, was overhead informing a fellow diner that he worked in politics—“not a Member of Parliament, no. I like to get things done.” How much power did his job carry with it? his companion asked. “About the same as a middle-ranking Cabinet minister,” barked Monckton, who on a recent visit to a country house gave his address in the visitor’s book as “10 Downing Street.”


This would be the equivalent of a White House staffer printing “1600 Penn. Ave.” as her home address.

Alan Rusbridger, “Diary,” The Guardian, July 13, 1984.


357   full biker leathers: For example, Christopher Silvester, “The Diary,” The Independent on Sunday, February 18, 2007.


Monckton, who as Christopher Monckton was an adviser to Margaret Thatcher at Number 10, once famously bumped into her as he was about to leave the building. Wearing a motorcyclist’s protective clothing and helmet and resembling Darth Vader, the towering figure pithily explained from underneath his visor that he was “off to meet the people”.


357   “There is only one way”: Christopher Monckton, “AIDS: A British View,” The American Spectator, January 1987.


357   “The homosexual lobby said”: Tim Adams, “The Interview: A favourite policy adviser of Mrs Thatcher in the Eighties, the 3rd Viscount Monckton of Brenchley is now the country’s most notorious climate-change sceptic and has thrown down a challenge to Al Gore to a public debate on global warming. What does he know that we don’t? Only that he has never been wrong,” The Observer, May 6, 2007.


357   “We are in this together now”: Martin Amis, “Making Sense of AIDS,” The Observer, June 23, 1985.


357   “dotty feminists”: Muriel Julius, “No Nudes Is Good Nudes: A Retrospective View,” The Contemporary Review, September 1, 1989.


357      “almost deranged war whoops”: Edward Pearce, “Auxiliary Boys’ Brigade,” The Guardian, February 18, 1991.


357      “he is quite simply barmy”: Simon Fanshawe, “Turning Over a New Belief,” Punch, March 11, 1992. “You need to picture him. At six-foot-four he is a vertically-unchallenged John Cleese lookalike in a bowler hat . . . I’m sure, in his fantasies, he is reasonable and down to Earth, but in his public views he is the intellectual equivalent of the silly walk.”


357      “source of continual bemusement”: Daily Telegraph, “Peterborough: Hot Seat,” July 22, 1992.


358      “A mad thirst for publicity”: Christopher Monckton, “It Is Feeble-Minded, Exploitative Sensationalism Perpetrated by the Talent-Free,” The Scotsman, September 23, 1997.

His Rule Two for unappealing art would have served equally well as a dealing-with-Monckton approach.


Rule Two: You can talk about Non-Art, by all means, and you can write about it, but never, never mention the name of the artist or the gallery. That means you can subject them to the ridicule and contempt they deserve while sternly denying them the publicity they crave.


358      “He is a professional sensationalist”: Hamish Fitzsimmons, “Climate Sceptic’s Nazi Jibe ‘Offensive,’” Australian Broadcasting Corporation, June 23, 2011.


358      “under a ball cap that said”: Gillian Bowditch, “From Here to Eternity,” The Sunday Times (London), September 3, 2000.


358      “a fix of English taxpayers’ money”: Patricia Nicol, “Sorry, We Haven’t a Clue,” Sunday Times (London), February 14, 1999.

“The phrase ‘subsidy junkies’ passed into the English language after that,” Monckton told the reporter modestly.


358      “Really I have always loved Scotland”: Angus Macleod, “ALL CHANGE — The Scots Are Subsidy Junkies and Whinge Like Crumpled Bagpipes, I Love the Scots and Want To Talk About the Subsidy We Can Expect; Christopher Monckton and His Support For Subsidies To Scotland,” Sunday Mail, April 16, 1995.


358      “many money-making wheezes”: Gillian Bowditch, “From Here to Eternity,” The Sunday Times (London), September 3, 2000.


358      started a gentlemen’s clothier: Mr. Pepys, “Why Diana Spilled the Beans To Bashir,” Evening Standard (London), November 24, 1995.


358      The boxer shorts are made”: Evening Standard (London), “Cheers For Carla...”, November 10, 1995.


358      There turned out to be a reason: Gillian Bowditch, “From Here to Eternity,” The Sunday Times (London), September 3, 2000.


359      “I would have become a member”: Patricia Nicol, “Sorry, We Haven’t a Clue,” Sunday Times (London), February 14, 1999.


359      “The diagnosis was a relief”: Gillian Bowditch, “From Here to Eternity,” The Sunday Times.

That wasn’t the only way the Times writer found him less than balanced: “As with many things that Monckton says and does, you have to negotiate a maze of contradictions to get to the truth . . . He is charming, affable company, but there is a tinge of paranoia running through much of what he says.”


359      “The fact is that I can’t go”: Tim Adams, “Monckton Saves the Day!” The Guardian, May 6, 2007.

Explanation for the title: “In his own head, Christopher Monckton, appears always to have been starring in a Boy’s Own adventure entitled ‘Monckton Saves the Day!’” 


359      “Possibly dying”: Patricia Nicol, “Sorry, We Haven’t a Clue,” Sunday Times (London), February 14, 1999.


359      “Bedridden for the best part”: Christopher Monckton, “How I Bet The House on a Puzzle and Lost,” Sunday Times (London), November 12, 2000.


359      a half million pounds: It was a big job. The property was the type that gets a name. There’s the advice from Thoreau, Beware all enterprises that require new clothes. There might be a similarly useful real estate caution: Beware homes with names.


Crimonmogate is a mansion 175 years old, surrounded by 200 acres of the finest Scottish land. But it was also a wreck, infested with rats, rot, damp and a 45ft bees’ nest. They spent GBP 500,000 on renovation.


Rebecca Fowler, “The Man Who Gambled and Lost . . . “, Daily Mail, November 23, 1999.

Unfortunately, it was also close to collapse. In trademark style, however, Monckton engaged an army of tradesmen and had soon created a home in which glittering parties for 1,000 guests were easily accommodated.


Tim Dawson, “Problem Solved,” The Sunday Times (London), January 8, 2006.


Bowditch, “From Here to Eternity,” The Sunday Times (London), September 3, 2000.


359      gut renovation: Mary Wilson, “Isn’t Life Grand,” The Sunday Times, April 16, 2000.


The first thing the Moncktons did was to place 12 tin buckets strategically around the house — “tin is important because you can hear the water pinging into it” — and set about restoring Crimonmogate to its Regency splendour . . . The roof has been renewed, they have replaced or repaired every gutter and downpipe, renewed the network of field drains, and rewired the entire house — “the wiring would have set fire to the place if it had not been so damp” — plus taken out, repaired and replaced nearly all the 100 windows.


359      he was hurrying to court to answer: Peter Clarke, “Brown and Prescott Are Told to Be Woy’s Boys,” The Sunday Times (London), September 20, 1998.


The Hon Christopher Monckton, who lives in a 67-bedroom enormity near Peterhead, was stopped by the police for apparently exceeding the speed limit on his motorbike in his becoming black leather gear. His excuse was that he had to rush as he did not want to miss his appearance in front of the sheriff for speeding. The Grampian police waved Baroness Thatcher’s favourite courtier on.


359      “I think I must be mad”: Yorkshire Post, “Puzzle Fans Queue Up for the Chance of £1M Prize,” June 3, 1999.


360      “I am challenging the world”: Victoria Mitchell, “No U-Turns On Trail of £1m Puzzle Prize; Thatcher Problem-Solver Gives the World a Brainteaser of His Own,” Daily Mail, January 9, 1999.


360      Solution, he estimated: Ruairi O’Kane, “An Eternal Optimist; Puzzle Toff’s Impossible $2M Dream,” Daily Star (Scottish Edition), January 24, 2007 “He thought it would take three years to complete . . . ”

“Puzzle Man . . . ”, Belfast News Letter (Northern Ireland), June 23, 2001.

Nick Gates, “Chanel Model Rescues Tory Toff Inventor,” Daily Star, June 22, 2001. Lord Monckton: “I designed Eternity to be a real challenge and anticipated someone solving it in around three years. . . ”

“Puzzle Inventor Sells Up,” The Times (London), June 22, 2001. “Christopher Monckton’s Eternity became a bestseller when he offered the cash prize. At the time the former policy advisor to Baroness Thatcher believed that it would take about three years for the puzzle to be solved.”


360      sell millions of units and become rich: Dan McDougall, “Pounds 1Million Mindbender; Money-Spinner: Scots Inventor Offers Huge Prize for Solving Jigsaw,” Daily Record, June 3, 1999.


The game is the brainchild of aristocrat Monckton, who hopes to make more than pounds 50 million from his invention. The manufacturers expect to sell 10 million copies worldwide but its creator is confident nobody will come close to solving the riddle for some time.


360      “So that’s one up for Scottish inventiveness”: Gavin Cameron, “Fiendish Puzzle Is Sell-Out,” Aberdeen Evening Express, June 3, 1999.


360      So the Lord launched Eternity: Christopher Monckton, “Christopher Monckton’s Diary,” Sunday Times (London), June 6, 1999.


360      “It could be an eight-year-old child”: Jo Willey, “Puzzle Fans Flock to Try for £1m Prize,” Press Association, June 2, 1999.

A good self-advertiser, he stressed this many places, many times. “This can’t be solved by computers or mathematicians using complex formulae. An eight-year-old child is as likely to solve it as a bedridden granny.” Alexandra Williams, “Who Wants Toy Be a Millionaire?”, The Mirror, June 3, 1999.


360      “It won’t be a computer”: “$2.4M No Puzzle to Jigsaw Lovers,” The Ottawa Citizen, June 4, 1999.


360      “so a computer can’t do it”: Jo Willey, “Puzzle Fans Flock To Try For £1m Prize,” Press Association, June 2, 1999.

“Puzzle Offers Pounds 1M Prize,” Birmingham Post, June 3, 1999. He was a gifted pitchman—a great help with warming—and was able to always re-hit the same mark. “It’s been designed so a computer can’t do it. It is designed so ordinary people have as much chance of solving it as people in Mensa.”

So that you could get headlines like: Ken Oxley, “My Puzzle Could Be Cracked By an OAP or Bored Child,” Daily Record, June 3, 1999. “Inventor Christopher Monckton claims his puzzle is ‘cheat-proof’. He says it as likely to be solved by an autistic child with highly developed spatial awareness as by a bored teenager or bed-ridden pensioner. He said: ‘This cannot be solved by computer geniuses and mathematicians using complex formulae, which is the beauty of it.’” (Monckton as an aid to transatlantic understanding: OAP is British for Old-Age Pensioner, for senior.)


360      by two Cambridge mathematicians: Annie Flury, “It Only Seemed Like Eternity,” The Express, October 27, 2000.


Mr Monckton was convinced it would be at least three years before anyone solved Eternity, by which time he would have made more than enough to cover half the prize money, with the remainder coming from an insurance policy.

Mr Selby, 32, from Cambridge, worked on the puzzle with help from former colleague Oliver Riordan, 28, who is one of the world’s top mathematicians . . .

[Selby explained,] “When I saw on the Internet that quite a few guys had 200-plus pieces I felt fairly confident Eternity could be solved. I decided to use a computer but to give it a lot of help along the way. First we worked out the difficulty of each piece using a probability model.

“We then programmed the computer to start work on the harder pieces first. It took about two weeks to decide on the most promising possibilities. We then constantly improved and refined the computer programme, although we did go up a few blind alleys and were lucky to solve it so quickly. It could have taken another two months.”


360      “Sometimes you live in a palace”: John McEntee, “McEntee,” The Express, October 6, 2000.


360      “toff makes pounds”: Simon Freeman, “Toff Makes Pounds 1 Million Prize Puzzle Blunder,” The Mirror, November 15, 1999.

Annie Flury, “It Only Seemed Like Eternity,” The Express, October 27, 2000.

Oliver Burkeman, “Who Wants to Ruin a Millionaire?”, The Guardian, October 30, 2000.


360      That honor belongs to Rubik’s cube: “Rubik’s Cube: Are You Interested in the World’s Best-Selling Puzzle Toy?”, Twisty Puzzle Wiki.’s%20Cube%20has%20celebrated,game%20and%20best%2Dselling%20toy

Accessed 7-25-22.


Introduced in 1980, the puzzle had after all a two-decade head start; within the first two Rubik years, 100 million cubes had sold worldwide. (So ubiquitous, there was a Saturday morning kids’ show: “‘Rubik, the Amazing Cube,’ a cartoon about a blue-headed Rubik with magical powers.”)

Hillary Greenbaum, Dana Rubenstein, “Who Made That? (Rubik’s Cube,” The New York Times Magazine, February 12, 2012.

Joan Verdon, “Rubik’s Cube and Spin Master: A $50 Million Deal with Endless Possibilities,” Forbes, November 15, 2020. Forbes has the Rubik number as 450 million.

It was understood from the start that Lord Monckton was in competition with Emö Rubik. “Christopher Monckton, its inventor, is gambling on Eternity becoming the Rubik’s Cube of the Millennium, allowing him to pay the prize from his royalties.”

Adam Lusher, “A $2-Million Brainteaser,” National Post, June 4, 1999.


360      The lord later upped this figure: Tim Adams, “Monckton Saves the Day!” The Guardian, May 6, 2007. “ . . . he now claims 500,000 copies of the puzzle were sold worldwide.”


360      He sat out the prize ceremony: “British Maths Whiz Solves Puzzle, Scoops One Million Pounds,” Agence France-Presse, October 26, 2000. Oliver Burkeman, “Who Wants to Ruin a Millionaire”, The Guardian. Alex O’Connell, “New Pounds 1M Puzzle for Code Cracker,” The Times (London), October 27, 2000.

Monckton had to list in unorthodox spots. The New York Post, November 13, 2000, “My Lord, Your Castle Awaits—On Ebay.” (“Monckton has the ideal occupant in mind. ‘It is the perfect estate for Prince Charles.’”) Seven months later, a buyer was found.

Bob Dow, “Heaven Scent; Chanel Beauty Buys House To Bail Out Puzzle Inventor,” Daily Record, June 22, 2001.


A Chanel supermodel has bailed out an uppercrust Tory left skint by a jigsaw. But the deal with stunning Candida Bond cost Christopher Monckton his Scots family seat.

Monckton, a former adviser to Margaret Thatcher, has sold 67-room Crimonmogate House in Aberdeenshire to Candida for pounds 1.2 million to clear his debts.

It’s a humbling end to his dream of making millions from a puzzle called Eternity . . . Harrow old boy Monckton said he was sad to leave Scotland, a nation he once said was full of “whingeing subsidy junkies”.


Plus, that evocative UK word for going bust: skint.


361      “I am a mathematician”: Lord Christopher Monckton, interviewed by Pauline Rose, “The Climate Change Con,” YouTube, August 6, 2011.

Monckton adds, “And I have an interest in poking my nose into things that are really not my business. I suppose every policymaker is a bit like that.” Of course, Monckton is not a policymaker.

Accessed 7-18-22.


361      “Quite an interesting character”: “Teddy Talks: The Eternity Puzzle—Professor Oliver Reardon,” St. Edmund Hall, Oxford University, May 14, 2015.

It’ll give you a chance to see the Eternity puzzle; it is a very becoming shade of blue.

Accessed 7-18-22.


361      “History,” he reassured a journalist: Frank Urquhart, “Aristocrat Admits Tale of Lost Home Was Stunt To Boost Puzzle Sales,” The Scotsman, January 24, 2007.


“I was selling the house anyway and they asked me if I would be willing to tell people I was selling the house because I was afraid somebody might solve the puzzle too fast. I said ‘yes’. They said, ‘Don’t you mind being made to look an absolute prat’, and I said, ‘No—I’m quite used to that’. History is full of stories that aren’t actually true.

“We sold shed-loads of extra puzzles and I made an handsome profit—and I sold the house as well.”


361      he reverted to the original: Michele Hewitson, “Michele Hewitson interview: Christopher Monckton,” New Zealand Herald, April 6, 2013.


He invented a puzzle called the Eternity Puzzle which offered a million quid to anyone who could solve it. When it became obvious it was going to be solved, he put Crimonmogate, his 67-room house in Scotland, on the market. I thought he’d later said this was a PR stunt and that he was going to sell it anyway, but he says no, somebody else said it was a PR stunt.


361      “I spent a month rootling about”: Lord Christopher Monckton, interviewed by Pauline Rose, “The Climate Change Con,” YouTube, August 6, 2011.

Accessed 8-1-22.


361      “To enjoy myself”: Peter Kingston, “Learning Curve; Christopher Monckton Recalls Sticky Bun Thrashes at a Time When He Thinks He Read Classics,” The Guardian (London), February 9, 1999.


361      The friend passed Monckton’s report along: Christopher Monckton, “The Sun Is Warmer Now Than for the Past 11,400 Years,” Sunday Telegraph, November 5, 2006.


361      Monckton’s piece crashed the server: 127,000 hits in two hours, as of 2006, would do it.

“Christopher Monckton of Brenchley,” The Heartland Institute, Who We Are.

Accessed 7-19-22.


Brendan Montague, “The Mystery Man Behind Monckton’s Climate Denial,” The Ecologist, November 1, 2018.


361      A former president of the American Association for the Advancement of Science: A James McCarthy tribute, from the American Association for the Advancement of Science; he died at the end of 2019.

Adam D. Cohen, “In Memoriam: James McCarthy, Trailblazing Climate Scientist and Communicator,” American Association for the Advancement of Science, December 13, 2019.

Accessed 7-19-22.


362      A lifelong nonsmoker: Allan Brandt, The Cigarette Century: The Rise, Fall, and Deadly Persistence of the Product That Defined America, Basic Books, 2009. Chapter 12, “The Trials of Tobacco,” 401.


362      like having a peeing section: Mitchell Smyth, “Hey, Weed Addicts! Here’s Your Smoking Salon in the Sky,” Toronto Sun, September 30, 1995.


362      “Oh no, Mommy”: Alan Edwards, “Utahn Was ‘Perfect’ As Tobacco Plaintiff,” Deseret News, October 11, 1997.


362      “a stunning battlefield surrender”: Martin Merzer, Elinor J. Brecher, “Big Tobacco Agrees to Pay $349 Million,” The Miami Herald, October 11, 1997.

The Wall was experiencing all kinds of structural troubles and simply not standing up very well. A videotape deposition by the Philip Morris CEO contending that cigarettes were no more addictive than gummy bears or coffee had aired on 60 Minutes to general ridicule and become widely mocked. (The industry wanted to claim that routes put flight crews up near carcinogenic cosmic rays, but the judge wouldn’t allow it. The attempt really does bring back the old days.) The Los Angeles Times pointed out Broin was “a landmark . . . The case is the first class action ever tried against the cigarette makers, as well as the first case to test their liability for illnesses supposedly suffered by bystanders from other people’s cigarettes.”

Myron Levin, “Jury Views CEO’s ‘Gummy Bear’ Deposition; Tobacco: Philip Morris Executive Testifies Cigarettes Aren’t Any More Addictive Than Coffee or Candy,” Los Angeles Times, July 18, 1997.


362      “marked the first time tobacco had”: Brandt, The Cigarette Century, Chapter 12, “The Trials of Big Tobacco,” 409.

Alan Edwards in Utah’s Deseret News pointed out something else; the quietly momentous end to the fight that had lasted from the 1978 Roper polling data on. “The settlement marks the first time the cigarette industry has accepted responsibility for secondhand smoke damage.”

Alan Edwards, “Utahn Was ‘Perfect’ As Tobacco Plaintiff,” Deseret News, October 11, 1997.

(Deseret means “land of the honeybee”; I’d always thought it was a chic Latter Day Saints spelling for “Desert.”)


362      “They have lost their resolve”: John Schwartz, “Secondhand Smoke Trial Ends in Deal; Tobacco Firms’ Settlement Includes $300 Million for Research Foundation,” The Washington Post, October 11, 1997.


362      settled with forty-six states at once: Barry Meier, “Cigarette Makers and States Draft a $206 Billion Deal,” The New York Times, November 14, 1998.


362      “Over the course of more than fifty years”: U.S. District Court for the District of Columbia, U.S. vs. Philip Morris et al, Civil Action No. 99-2496, Amended Final Opinion by U.S. District Court Judge Gladys Kessler, August 17 2006.

Accessed 7-12-22.


Myron Levin, “Big Tobacco Is Guilty of Conspiracy,” Los Angeles Times, August 18, 2006.

Sweeter to print than the New York Times’ oddly reticent-seeming, “New Limits Set over Marketing of Cigarettes.” Then I understood, via an editorial the paper ran two days later. The Times didn’t think Kessler had gone far enough.

Editorial, “Tobacco Racketeers Got Off Easy,” The New York Times, August 20, 2006.


363      as director of Philip Morris’ Sound Science Coalition: John H. Cushman Jr., “Industrial Group Plans to Battle Climate Treaty,” The New York Times, April 26, 1998.


Among the plan’s advocates are groups already linked to the best-known critics of global-warming science. They include the Science and Environment Policy Project, founded by Fred Singer, a physicist noted for opposing the mainstream view of climate science. Frederick Seitz, another prominent skeptic on global warming, is involved with two other groups mentioned in the plan: the George C. Marshall Institute, where Dr. Seitz is chairman, and the Advancement of Sound Science Coalition, where he is on the science advisory board.


A few weeks later, Crandall contacted the Times, to complain she hadn’t attended the meeting. But there’s her name, and S. Fred Singer’s organization, on the actual American Petroleum Institute document—included a decade later in the congressional investigation of Philip Cooney and the Bush administration.

American Petroleum Institute, “Global Climate Science Communications Action Plan,” April 3, 1998, in U.S. House of Representatives, Compilation of Exhibits, Political Interference with Science: Global Warming, Part II, March 19, 2007.


363      “He moved into climate denial”: Tom Clynes, “The Battle over Climate Science,” Popular Science, June 21, 2012.


363      a “network of ideological and advocacy organizations”: Union of Concerned Scientists, Smoke, Mirrors & Hot Air: How ExxonMobil Uses Big Tobacco’s Tactics to Manufacture Uncertainty on Climate Science, Union of Concerned Scientists 2007.


363      “climate ‘black ops’”: Elliot Negin, “Did ExxonMobil Just Admit It’s Still Funding Climate Science Deniers?”, Huffington Post, November 23, 2005. Negin is a senior writer with the Union of Concerned Scientists.

Accessed 7-18-22.


363      many millions pipelined into the fight: Way higher. According to Greenpeace [Investigations], the Kochs poured $145,556,729 into ninety groups between 1997 (that is, Kyoto) and 2018.

Accessed 7-18-22.


Greenpeace uses 1997 as a benchmark year due to increased coordinated backlash against global climate negotiations leading to the Kyoto Protocol of 1998. We define climate change denial as “anyone who is obstructing, delaying or trying to derail policy steps that are in line with the scientific consensus that says we need to take rapid steps to decarbonize the economy.”


363      All these groups evangelized doubt: Union of Concerned Scientists, Smoke, Mirrors & Hot Air: How ExxonMobil Uses Big Tobacco’s Tactics to Manufacture Uncertainty on Climate Science, Union of Concerned Scientists 2007.


364      an executive with England’s Royal Society: It’s a somehow moving letter. Available below. (The Royal Society maintains it at their website.)

Bob Ward, Senior Manager, Policy Communication, Royal Society, To: Nick Thomas, Director, Corporate Affairs, Esso UK (ExxonMobil), September 4, 2006.

Accessed 7-18-22.


David Adam, “Royal Society Tells Exxon: Stop Funding Climate Change Denial,” The Guardian, September 20, 2006.


364      Exxon announced it was cutting denial ties: The Union of Concerned Scientists report got great play. ABC, PBS, the wire services, overseas press, the Post, the Times.

This is from Clifford Krauss, “Exxon Accused of Trying to Mislead Public,” The New York Times, January 4, 2007.


The Union of Concerned Scientists released a report on Wednesday accusing Exxon Mobil of spending millions of dollars to manipulate public opinion on the seriousness of global warming.

“Many of the tactics, and even some of the same organizations and actors used by Exxon Mobil to mislead the public, draw upon the tobacco industry’s 40-year disinformation campaign,” the report said.

The report said that a task force that Exxon Mobil helped create on global climate science in 1998 included someone who had led a nonprofit organization called the Advancement of Sound Science Coalition, “which had been covertly created by the tobacco company Philip Morris in 1993 to manufacture uncertainty about the health hazards posed by secondhand smoke” . . .


In his 2007 congressional testimony—same hearing as Lord Monckton—Harvard’s James McCarthy outlined the tobacco material and noted the wide coverage enjoyed by the UCS report.


The report also details links in strategy and personnel between ExxonMobil’s efforts and those of the tobacco industry. It includes the text, for instance, of a seminal 1998 memo that ExxonMobil helped draft as part of a small group called the Global Climate Science Team that set much of the company’s strategy in motion. As the report shows, this internal memo didn’t just mimic the tobacco industry’s strategy, it even drew upon key personnel who had implemented it . . .

The UCS “Smoke, Mirrors, and Hot Air” report, which was covered in more than 300 media outlets, came on the heels of other criticism of ExxonMobil’s disinformation campaign. In September 2006, the Royal Society, Britain’s premier scientific academy, sent a letter to ExxonMobil urging the company to stop funding the dozens of groups spreading disinformation on global warming and also strongly criticized the company’s “inaccurate and misleading” public statements on global warming. On October 27, 2006, Senators Olympia Snowe (R-ME) and John D. Rockefeller (D- WV) sent a letter to ExxonMobil urging the company to stop funding climate contrarian groups. All three of these documents have led to public outrage about the company’s cynical campaign to delay climate action.


“Efforts to Influence Science Policy: Statement of Dr. James McCarthy Alexander Agassiz Professor, Biological Oceanography Harvard University,” Congressional Quarterly Congressional Testimony, Committee on Science and Technology, Subcommittee on Investigations and Oversight, March 28, 2007.

The two U.S. senators—Olympia Snowe (R), Jay Rockefeller (D)—had sent their soft signal boost of the Royal Society letter in fall of 2006. Another weirdly moving document: the system basically working. (Clayton Sandell, “Senators to Exxon: Stop the Denial,” ABC News, October 27, 2006.) And in January of 2007, Exxon announced that it was cutting back on denial funding.


Jeffrey Bell, “Climate Change at Exxon; Oil Giant Takes Steps to Help Shape Curbs on U.S. Emissions,” The Wall Street Journal, January 11, 2007.

Joe Nocera, “Exxon Mobil Just Wants to be Loved,” The New York Times, February 10, 2007. “So why do ExxonMobil executives sound so defensive? So beleaguered? So misunderstood? Oh, right. Global warming.”


364      “Individuals who do not have”: “Global Climate Science Communications Action Plan,” American Petroleum Institute, April 3, 1998, in U.S. House of Representatives, Compilation of Exhibits, Political Interference with Science: Global Warming, Part II, March 19, 2007.

A pretty fascinating and revealing document, as wish lists tend to be. You see the world as an industry would ideally construct it, things an industry would ideally want—what a made-for-them universe would and would not contain.


Victory Will Be Achieved When


  Average citizens “understand” (recognize) uncertainties in climate science; recognition of uncertainties becomes part of the “conventional wisdom”
   Media “understands” (recognizes) uncertainties in climate science
  Media coverage reflects balance on climate science and recognition of the validity of viewpoints that challenge the current “conventional wisdom”
  Industry senior leadership understands uncertainties in climate science, making them stronger ambassadors to those who shape climate policy
  Those promoting the Kyoto treaty on the basis of extant science appear to be out of touch with reality.”


Current Reality


Unless “climate change” becomes a non-issue, meaning that the Kyoto proposal is defeated and there are no further initiatives to thwart the threat of climate change, there may be no moment when we can declare victory for our efforts.


364      “The global warming consensus”: Sheldon Rampton and John Stauber, Trust Us, We’re Experts, Putnam 2001. Chapter 10, “Global Warming Is Good for You,” 270.


364      a “professional climate-change denier”: William Finnegan, “The Miner’s Daughter,” The New Yorker, March 25, 2013.


364      “out of the action for twenty-five years”: BBC, Storyville, “Meet the Climate Sceptics,” January 31, 2011.

Accessed July 10, 2022.


365      The illness had been loss of influence: For example, in 2000, Monckton told the London Times’ Gillian Bowditch in no uncertain terms that he had not been diagnosed until 1996.


This would have floored a more cautious man but, four years ago at the time his illness was diagnosed, the Moncktons bought Crimonmogate from a third cousin for Pounds 250,000. They have spent Pounds 500,000 on renovations.


That is, date of onset was labile, and seemed to fluctuate in response to the viscount’s rhetorical need and whim. Bowditch is the journalist who explained Monckton was “charming, affable company, but there is a tinge of paranoia running through much of what he says.”

Gillian Bowditch, “From Here To Eternity,” The Sunday Times (London), September 3, 2000.


365      A speech Monckton delivered in 2009: 3.5 million views, in four formats.

“Is Obama Poised to Cede US Sovereignty?”, Lord Christopher Monckton, Minnesota Free Market Institute, October 14, 2009.

“Lord Christopher Monckton Speaking in St. Paul,” Minnesota Free Market Institute, October 15, 2009.

“Updated With Slides—Lord Christopher Monckton Speaking In St. Paul,” Minnesota Free Market Institute, October 21, 2009.

“Al Gore’s Inconvenient Scam, Lies Versus Lord Monckton Truth and Logic,” Lord Christopher Monckton, Minnesota Free Market Institute, July 26, 2011.

Accessed 7-15-22.

You forget just how accomplished a speaker Monckton is, until you’re putting together YouTube clips: it may just be years of Le Carré and Downton Abbey and other BBC lagniappes: we’re conditioned to treat an accent like Monckton’s with respect. A voice like Monckton’s sounds informed. It’s George Smiley and Judi Dench.

Monckton’s official bio gives the number as five million, which seems unverifiable. His bio adds another distinction, the speed with which it attracted those clicks.


A speech by Lord Monckton to 1,000 citizens of St. Paul, Minnesota in October 2009, in which he drew public attention to a then little-known draft plan by the U.N. to establish an unelected world government at the (now-failed) climate summit at Copenhagen in December 2009, received 1,000,000 YouTube hits in a week — thought to be the fastest-ever YouTube platinum for a political speech. Some five million have now seen the presentation on various websites.


The Heartland Institute, Who We Are, “Christopher Monckton of Brenchley.”

Accessed 7-19-22.

This is the same bio, with the same claims, the viscount uses at conservative think tank The Independent Institute.


365      “So thank you, America”: “Lord Christopher Monckton Speaking in St. Paul,” Minnesota Free Market Institute, October 15, 2009.

Accessed 7-19-22.


365      “Now I know in American-speak”: BBC, Storyville, “Meet the Climate Sceptics,” January 31, 2011.

Accessed July 10, 2022.


366      calling him denial’s number-one spokesperson: Peter Sinclair, “Debunking Lord Monckton, Part One,” Climate Crocks, April 11, 2010.

Accessed July 18, 2022.


366      “impose a communist world government”: “Is Obama Poised to Cede US Sovereignty?”, Lord Christopher Monckton, Minnesota Free Market Institute, October 14, 2009.

Accessed 7-19-22.


366      “It is better just to sit back”: Lord Christopher Monckton, interviewed by Pauline Rose, “The Climate Change Con,” YouTube, August 6, 2011.

Accessed 7-18-22.


366      “Lord Monckton isn’t taken seriously by anyone”: Australian Broadcasting Corporation, RN Breakfast with Fran Kelly, “British MP Calls for a Carbon Tax: Interview with John Gummer, Former Conservative MP and Secretary of State for the Environment,” March 21, 2011.

John Gummer, Lord Deben, had also been chairman of the Conservative Party when Monckton worked at Downing Street.


John Gummer: Well, Lord Monkton isn’t taken seriously by anyone. I mean he was a bag carrier in Mrs Thatcher’s office. And the idea that he advised her on climate change is laughable . . . Mrs Thatcher used to have the best scientists in the world in and she would nail them to the wall as she argued with them, because she was a scientist. And, like me, she didn’t want to believe in climate change, it’s the science makes it absolutely impossible not to believe that this is the most likely interpretation of what facts, which are becoming more and more clear.

Accessed 7-18-22.


366      “I asked myself, ‘If I don’t, who will?’”: “Frankly,” Professor Abraham added, “the nonscientists in the audience didn’t have a chance.”

Jim Winterer, “John Abraham Takes a Stand,” University of Saint Thomas, Newsroom, March 1, 2012.

Accessed 7-16-22.


366      “This guy is a great speaker”: Jim Winterer, “John Abraham Takes a Stand,” University of Saint Thomas, Newsroom, March 1, 2012.

Accessed 7-16-22.


366      The corrections ran eighty-three: This is apparently the YouTube chapter.

Dr. Abraham’s response video is broken up into six segments. Here’s the first.

“Abraham Debunks Lord Monckton Climate Denialist: 1of 6,” YouTube, August 19, 2011.

Accessed 7-16-22.


366      “He’s just making it up”: Barry Bickmore, “Monckton Makes It Up,” RealClimate, August 7, 2010. The geologist explained he'd had one of those big obliterative aims. To leave “no excuse for anyone to take [Monckton] seriously about this issue.”

Accessed 7-18-22.


367      “I endorse your stand on homosexuals”: BBC, Storyville, “Meet the Climate Sceptics,” January 31, 2011.

Accessed July 10, 2022.

In the BBC transcript this speaker is referred to simply and elegantly as “Bigoted Elderly Man.”

He is immediately succeeded by a kindly-looking woman, who assures Monckton, “You’re protected—I’ve asked Saint Michael the Archangel, ‘Please send a whole legion of angels, to be with him all the time!’”


367      In 2011, Lord Monckton made a surprise announcement: This achievement is noted, too, in Monckton’s UKIP (a sort of pre-Brexit party) biography.


Alongside these interests, Lord Monckton has also found a cure for the chronic infection Grave’s Disease—which affects the thyroid gland …

United Kingdom Independence Party, “Christopher—A Man of Many Talents,” June 4, 2010.

Accessed 7-19-22.


367      “We’re curing people with everything from HIV”: BBC, Storyville, “Meet the Climate Sceptics,” January 31, 2011.

Accessed July 10, 2022.

Monckton gave a detailed account of his cure’s creation to a journalist from the New Zealand Herald.


If you ask, as I idiotically did, how his [Monckton's] health is now, ten minutes later you will not have a definitive answer to that question.

Although I am in full agreement with the specialist who said he was the most fascinating case he’d ever seen. The story, or part of the story, is about how nobody could figure out what was wrong with him and so he did a mathematical diagnosis of his symptoms and exhaustive amounts of research and — after much going back to specialists — came up with a “preparation” which might help and which was then denied him by the National Health Service and so . . . he made it himself. What, in the kitchen? In the library, at home, as it happens.

“I got some eye of bat and toe of newt . . . ” Then he couldn’t get the stuff to “go to solution” so he put it in the loch at the bottom of his garden and it did whatever it was supposed to do and then . . . “And then you took it?” I said, hopefully, seeking a cure as an answer.

“No, no, no. Of course not. I wrote up the lab notes and sent them to the surgeon and said: ‘Look, am I going to kill myself?’” . . .

I can’t tell you what the stuff was because “we’ve patented it and until we’ve published the patent I’m not allowed to discuss that.”


Michele Hewitson, “Michele Hewitson interview: Christopher Monckton,” New Zealand Herald, April 6, 2013.


367      “Monckton is not the only climate skeptic”: Climate Brief, “Lord Monckton Attacked from All Sides . . . By Climate Sceptics,” February 10, 2011.

Accessed 7-19-22.


367      “Christopher Monckton has had no”: Brendan Montague, “The Men Behind Britain’s Climate Denying Charity,” The Ecologist, November 12, 2018.

Accessed 7-19-22.

The interview quoted is from January 2013, and can be found separately here:

Brendan Montague, “BM Interviewing Dr. Benny Peiser,” January 5, 2013.

Accessed 7-19-22.


Brendan Montague, “Lawson and Monckton Row over Climate Science campaigning,” Desmog UK, September 8, 2014.

Accessed 7-19-22.


367      “deathstyle,” Monckton wrote: Christopher Monckton, “Calling the Non-Heterosexuals’ Bluff,” WND, November 23, 2014.


Two additional tastes, as unsavory as G.A. Henty—except Monckton is generating the copy himself.


The QWERTYs—who represent about 0.5 percent of the population—have brilliantly promoted themselves by carefully shifting the debate away from what homosexuals actually do to each other (just ask any proctologist: all of them are heartily sick of trying to repair the gross damage caused by deviant sexual practices) and on to “celebrating” what is misleadingly presented as a “valid alternative lifestyle.” Deathstyle, more like.

And why have homosexuals—most of whose partners last as little as a few hours—been so keen to promote the lifetime promises of so-called “gay” so-called “marriage”? The reason, of course, is that they cannot produce children, so they want to adopt them. Is this fair to the children? The answer is no.

Accessed 7-19-22.


367      No mention of his cure: “Deadly disease,” Lord Monckton placidly explains, is “the wages of promiscuity.” Monckton, “Calling the Non-Heterosexuals’ Bluff.”


367      “Yes, this man used to be”: Helena Horton, “Do Gay People REALLY Have 20,000 Sexual Partners? A Former UKIP Deputy Leader Thinks So,” The Daily Mirror (London), December 1, 2014.


367      “no place for men like Monckton”: Jenn Selby, “Nigel Farage Condemns Former Ukip Deputy Monckton’s Comments That Gay Men Have ‘20,000 Sexual Partners’ in Their ‘Miserable Lives,’” The Independent (London), November 18, 2014.


368      “No it ain’t”: Kilez More, “Klimawandel (Klimalüge, Klimaschwindel),” May 16, 2011.

Which translates as “Climate Change (Climate Lie, Climate Fraud).” A title a little on the nose.

Accessed 7-19-22.


369      bonus final snapshots: Climate Change Awards, “S. Fred Singer: 2014 Winner of the Lifetime Achievement in Climate Science Award,” Heartland Institute, 2014.

Accessed 7-19-22.


368      “the right approach to life”: “Fred Singer Award—ICCC9 July 9, 2014,” The Heartland Institute, 2014.

Accessed 7-19-22.


368      Arthur Robinson accepting a trophy: Climate Change Awards, “Arthur Robinson, Ph.D.: 2014 Winner of the Voice of Reason Award,” Heartland Institute, 2014.

Accessed 7-19-22.


368      “The world depends on us”: “Arthur Robinson Award—ICCC9 July 9, 2014,” The Heartland Institute, 2014.

Accessed 7-19-22.


368      Dauntless Purveyor of Climate Truth: Climate Change Awards, “Christopher Monckton of Brenchley: 2014 Winner of the Dauntless Purveyor of Climate Truth Award,” Heartland Institute, 2014.

Accessed 7-19-22.

The Parrot and the Igloo by David Lipsky